"The gospel gives us hope that all sin, even nagging sins, can be both forgiven and subdued. But because sin has such persistence and power, we must be vigilant in our struggle against it. As John Owen puts it, “If sin be subtle, watchful, strong, and always at work in the business of killing our souls, and we be slothful, negligent, foolish . . . can we expect a comfortable event?”

https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/four-steps-to-kill-nagging-sins

Feeling very disappointed at myself and wondering how I became a leader of two ministries with me, being myself. I don't want to take the grace and mercy of God cheaply. I want to repent, resolve and remember. But some times, my resolve fails.